A better way to deal with evil dictators - the waggy finger
According to the latest Mori research Labour could be on to lose many marginal seats to the Tories, mainly because of a Liberal Democrat surge. It doesn't take a great deal of intelligence to work out why Labour are so in doldrums -- the war in Iraq.Furthermore it seems possible that Tony Blair might have itchy feet, and join in another invasion sooner rather than later. He clearly must be stopped.
One difficult issue however for those who opposed Blair's foreign adventures (well at least it was a difficult issue before the sheer levels of cock-up Blair would achieve in Iraq unfolded) was 'what would you do to deal with mad dictators instead?'.
Well here's my plan. "A good talking to with the waggy finger is better than an invasion of 500,000 marines".
Was I right? There's only one way to find out - to give it a go. But I needed advice, an who better than Mrs Thatcher, who has much experience with dealing with dictators. In a wide-ranging discussion she said she prefers to use a combination of the Royal Navy and her handbag. We both agreed however that in my case both would invite ridicule. So she gave me her tentative backing. She suggested however that I practice first on a friendly mad dictator, and suggested she contact her son for some leads.
Not necessary I said. There is only one friendly mad dictator in the world, Colonel Gadaffi of Libya, and he's standing across the way from you.
A poacher turned gamekeeper in this field, he gave me some valuable insights into technique. As you can see he leads with the left, and keeps the finger wag below chest height. It confers an immediate advantage.
The big moment had arrived, Saddam himself. Forgetting the Colonel's wise advice, I launched a full height finger wag. Saddam countered with a typically Arab nonchalance, but I think he knew the best man had won.
posted by Matthew @ 1/04/2005 08:51:00 PM
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